Button, button

I picked up a copy of the April issue of Parents magazine yesterday. No excuse, really. I am a bit compulsive about buying magazines, even ones that have annoyed me in the past.

Page 25 suggests that readers with “Some bunny to love”, get over the disappointment that their infants cannot indulge in Cadbury Mini Eggs this Spring by noting “…you still get to celebrate the holiday by dressing her up real cute.”

Real cute.

Yes, I know there is another rag titled Real Simple, but I have always hoped it was intended to read as two separate words.

I decided to chalk up real cute to insidious marketing copy and paged past to a piece designed to provide helpful suggestions for taking a vacation with your friends and their families.

Leslie Pepper, your content is fine, but can you explain why the young girl in the red bikini in the center of the group shot on page 192, smiling broadly into the camera, is missing her belly button? Perhaps a medical procedure is responsible? I sincerely hope magazines do not airbrush the bellies of young children.

It is irresponsible enough that the article about postpartum weight loss on page 151,shows a svelte mother struggling to button a pair of skinny jeans, in spite of her flat waist and the obvious extra material around the waistband of the pants.

Real cute, Parents. Real cute.

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9 responses to “Button, button

  1. That popping sound you heard was my head exploding.

    That is all.

  2. I actually just bought that one, but didn’t notice the disappearing navel, but also sneered at the “post-partum” jean shot. Puh-leeze.

    My peeve was actually related to why there is no purchasing guide in the magazine as I fell in love with the argyle vest with the skull and crossbones for the article about raising boys.

  3. DD, I’m going to e-mail you, but if you look closely at the older kid’s shirt it says Small Paul.

    http://www.paulfrank.com/clothing/smallpaul/

    It looks as though Zappos has some of the line, but I did not find your vest.

    Maybe try Olliebollen or another boutique?

    ETA: The article about raising boys was overall a pretty good one. I don’t agree with everything the author had to say, but I’m going to see if I can get the book via library reserve.

  4. Even those of us who have mid-section weight gain for many other reasons hate that crap.

  5. Seriously, Karrie. Don’t get me started on that hot mess of a magazine. Real BAD!!!

  6. Hmmm, I had the same idea about the postpartum portion. For some asinine reason I have a seven billion year long free subscription to Parents. I didn’t notice the child missing her belly button, though.

    The raising boys article pissed me off, too. My DAUGHTER does all that stuff – makes guns, plays rough, etc without being prompted as well. I guess she’s shaping up to be a right little lesbian at three? Oh crap, she plays with baby dolls too…

  7. I am kind of a magazine junkie but found myself increasingly bored and annoyed with both Parents and Parenting (my standard is I should get at least 45 minutes of entertainment out of them to be worth my while). To be fair there were some good articles but as a new mom I got tired of the “10 Hidden Dangers in your Home” scare articles that basically went over the same crap that every pamphlet or first year baby book tells you (plugs, stairs) or “SIDS” stuff or whatever…

  8. Um, I haven’t seen the pics, but I can only imagine. I’m sure the “chubby” momma was all of a size 6. No wait, even better, an 8. GASP. Why would she even pose for pictures????

  9. I went looking for the missing navel. Did you notice the kid next to missing navel girl could give Brad Pitt’s in “Fight Club” cut abs a run for his money? Some weirdo was messing with that photo.

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